Continue on in Holiness

This week has been a series of emotional days. Rocke has been struggling with fatigue. So I worry about him. A friend of mine is struggling with an issue with another friend. Work has been going ok for the first time for a while. It is the times that Rocke & I have in the morning with our Lord. We read the bible and study and have our time with God before we start our day. If it wasn't for our faith in God, I don't think we could make it through even one of the rocky days that we have had to endure the past few years. Rocke still isn't working but we have yet to starve. Praise God for friends. Praise God for family. Praise God for His Word. Praise God for being such a great part of my life. May I strive to be Holy every day, every hour, every minute and even every second.

Bike Blessing & a me blessing included

Today was our bike blessing for our CMA (Christian Motorcyclist Association) chapter. I was so nervous about this day. Those people who know me, know that I can talk and that I do a lot of it. But I have to get to know you first. I may seem standoffish or stuck up, but really I am neither. I am just scared to talk to people. Today was a true test for me. There were strangers and friends alike. They all came with one main purpose and that was to have their bike blessed. I not only talked to other people without a sidekick, but I sang in public!! Can you beleive it? I can't!!! I put my sunglasses on (we were outside), and shut my eyes. I was singing for my Lord Jesus Christ. It was amazing!! I didn't think I could do it, but the Lord gave me the power to do it. I never could have done it without HIM. We ended with the song, "There's power in the blood". How fitting!!

Today I just want to whine

Yes, I would like a little cheese to go with my whine!! I have to get out of this funk that I am in today. I want to complain and whine. I am feeling sorry for myself. I am feeling all alone and like nobody cares. I know that God cares but I don't feel it. You know what I mean Jelly Bean? Ok, from the top. My sister Dotty always tells me that I need to "peel back the layers to what is really going on underneath". But most of the time, the underneath is dirty, messy and just plain yucky! But back to what I was talking about rather than rambling. I tried to call Dotty and she wasn't home. I have been trying to talk to my sisters for a while now, but I can't talk to them because I never get in touch with them. It seems as if every time I call they either don't answer or can't answer. They just don't have time for me. When they do have time, I don't. It really seems as if Susie is ignoring me, cause she never calls back. She finds time to call and talk to others (Mom, Dotty), but never can talk to me. And yes I know that she talks to them because they are more than happy to tell me what she says. That was the first thing. The next thing was that we are having our bike blessing next Saturday for our CMA chapter. My ministry for CMA is music. They plan on having music there, but I was not even asked. Whine! Whine! Whine! Poor little old me! Okay peeling layers. God may be telling me to slow down and wait for them to contact me. He may be telling me that I picked the wrong ministry. I don't want to wait for them to call me, cause it will never happen. So what if it doesn't? Will the world come to an end? So what if I have to pick another ministry? Will the world come to an end?

All I can do is the best that I can do. When God shuts the door, he opens a window for escape. Okay God let me soar out the window!

Memorial Day is upon us

This weekend is Memorial Day. Does this mean the beginning of summer? This year will mean a lot to our family as this is the year that we have someone close to us serving over in Irag. Something really nice is that we can talk to him over the internet. Kitty has a web cam so she can actually see him when she talks to him. We received word that Matt arrived safely in Iraq. Sunday our chursh will be doing a tribute to those serving in the military and Matt will be among those honored. We also have a Bike Blessing in Superior that day. Can't wait for the weekend!!!

Give up kinda day

Today I was called into the office by the acting store manager. Before the old boss left, I was given a "verbal coaching". Which is a fancy name for a reprimand. The first in the step towards losing your job. First step is verbal, second is a written, third is what they call a decision day, then next you are gone. After the old boss left, I talked to the big boss. He said he would look into it, because I felt as if it was personal on not work related. I still think it was. Others do the same thing a lot. I did it once and got in trouble for it. Anyway, I was told that they were going to let the coaching stand. I was frustrated and angry. I did not let my anger show. I just wanted to cry, but I didn't. I started to whine to God about it. I thought He would at least sympathize with me. Well, that didn't happen. I did not like the answers I got. First I said, "it's not fair". God said, "Well, life's not fair. Isn't that you always told your kids?" So then I said, "I work really hard for this company and they don't even appreciate it. Other people can slack off and not get their work donw, but nothing happens to them. So from now on I will just do my work, but I will not work hard." God said, "Work as for the Lord, not man". "I don't want to" I replied. God said, "too bad, I want you to show them how you can rise above this". Okay, Okay, but I don't have to like it.

A Change is a comin'

I haven't wrote in here for a long time. But change is a comin'. I realized that even though, I may think that nobody reads this, it doesn't matter. I can use this blog as a tribute to my Lord & Savior. The change I talk about is about me. On Thursday night, Rocke & I along with many people of the Hayward Wesleyen Chursh attended a "listening point" session. I talked and I listened. After it was all done, we went out on the lawn and prayed together as we faced outward rather than inward towards each other. It made me start to thinking. Sometimes we spend too much time dwelling on the negative rather than on the positives of life. We have to enjoy life and what it brings. We have to enjoy each moment that the Lord brings us. Some of those moments may be sad, some may make us angry, some make us laugh, while still others will make us greive. My sister wrote something to me today that said, "Go ahead and look at the past, but don't stare!". Today we went garage saling and then we found out that Dotty and Layla would be in Rice Lake also. We met them for lunch. It was a great moment. I am enjoying the moment as they come, even if my plans change. Change is hard for me, but I am going to embrace "the change". And I don't mean the "Change of life" (menopause).

God is my best friend

Just recenly I had some people in my life hurt me terribly. At first I was very hurt. Then I talked to God and he showed me that they are just humans. The REAL TRUE friend I have is him. I can have earthly friends, but I have to be prepared that they are frail. They will hurt me. They will not always treat me with love and compaasion. They will not drop everything to help me. They will exclude me from their lives sometimes. But they will always be just what they are: Human! Only GOD can be GOD.

Something that I have discovered throught this experience is that God is my best friend. Earthly friends can hurt you. Earthly friends and family may ignore you, talk about you, shun you, exclude you, and pit others against you (whether it is on purpose or by mistake). God listens to you no matter what kind of mood you are in. He loves you no matter what. He doesn't make asumptions about you or make fun of you. He listens and truly listens. He knows your downfalls, your mistakes, your failures and your personality. He loves you just the same. Only God can see the person we can be, not the one who makes mistakes. He knows you in and out. He is not only my Savior, He is my best friend!!